Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
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