I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
And then the night went full on bisexual.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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