I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize