I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
