I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
