he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
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