For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching her eat just hurts me
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
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