I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
don't judge my taste in strippers
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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