Michael Bay diarrhea
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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