Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize
