Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
