Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize