i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Randomize
