I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Randomize
