omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
