What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
