i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
