we have officially lost it.
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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