Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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