i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
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