check it out our google latitudes are spooning
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Randomize
