My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
