Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Randomize