I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
