It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
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