I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
