I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
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