My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize
