we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Randomize