Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
