apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
