So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
Randomize