Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
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I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
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We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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