So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
