Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate