Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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