I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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