Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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