you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Randomize
