dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
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