I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
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