More tranny stories later!
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
