I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Randomize
