I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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