Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
