i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Randomize