can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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