I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
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