I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
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