The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Randomize
