pedialite and red bull = repair kit
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
