You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
Randomize
